Basta Blogger...

Hahaha check this out! This is a bumper sticker that's being sold online. There's a shirt too. Here's the link http://www.cafepress.com/rickeyorg.45915607 so even though I took the pic they get free advertising. (Thanks sa link be! :) ). Totoo ba to? Sabi saken proven na daw hahaha! Sa mga may lover na blogger diyan, you guys be the judge. ;)

MP

This night is reminiscent of those days when we were doing our Machine Problems (MPs), trying to finish them 3 nights before the deadline. :). Except, before, I usually wasn't the main programmer, and now I'm the ONLY one. This project is a great way to toot my own horn, let people know I can actually function well on my own. The only problem is that I HAVEN'T been procrastinating. I've been working since the day I started, and still ended up like this, on a holiday, waking up at 3 am and even worse, not being able to sleep at all. The added stress of not having a decent internet connection in this part of the hotel is also driving me nuts. I have filled my stomach with oats, oats and more oats, plus about 3 servings of coffee. And now I am blogging for a few minutes, just to wake myself up and stop myself from taking those 5 steps towards the bed and falling asleep instantly. What am I saying? It's only 10:00 pm. I guess when your time is dependent on someone whose time is running 3 hours later than yours, you start feeling like you're in the same time zone. (I actually said 'time' 3 times in one sentence). Come to think about it, the person I'm talking about is sick, can barely function, and yet, forced himself to talk to me until about 12:30 am (EST). You can't blame me for tying my days to someone who's just as equally tied to mine. :).

I keep thinking just to hang in there. If I don't get any sleep until I leave for New York, at least I know that when I get on that red-eye flight on Thursday, I will be sleeping soundly, and will wake up just in time to have the sun shine on my life again.

Envy

I hate you.

For beating me to the finish line
For being more beautiful.
For being liked by everyone.
For not needing to make an effort, and still getting what you want.
For being richer.
For being with your friends.
For having friends.
For being loved.
For knowing how to love.
For being flawless.

For owning what I cannot have.

-*-*-*-

Envy is such a human trait. It festers and rots in your being like an undeniable disease, and still, people can't help but give in to it sometimes. Why not look at the person you'd like to be, though, instead of the persons around you, instead of trying to measure up to them, measure up to that unattainable self you desperately want to be. There will never be someone exactly like you, hence there will never be someone exactly like the person you're imagining yourself to become someday. So just forget envy and go for it.

Courage

"Heart don't fail me now
Courage don't desert me
Don't turn back now that we're here
People always say life is full of choices
No one ever mentions fear

Or how the road can seem so long
Or how the world can seem so vast
Courage see me through
Heart i'm trusting you
On this journey... "

Journey to the Past - Aaliyah

-*-*-*-

There are times in your life that you just have to take a leap of faith, and trust in what your heart is saying. I've always been a scaredy-cat, who fears a lot of things and choices more than they deserve to be feared. Right now there seems to be a trend of fear surrounding a lot of the people I've come to know and love. The fear of:

1. Being hurt again.
2. Hurting someone.
3. What everyone else will say.
4. Giving your all and getting nothing in return.
5. Rejection.
6. Finding out the truth.
7. Telling the truth.

8. Being lied to.
9. Falling out of love.
10. LOVE.

At Valentine's Day pamandin. Happy Valentine's Day nga pala sa inyong lahat. I know a lot of you out there aren't with the ones you love. And some don't even have people to love. Hehe someone from YM's status today was 'I love you... self' hahaha ok shout out sayo kilala mo kung sino ka. I doubt though mababasa mo to. Anyway, scary tlga magmahal. And every time you make that decision, you also take the risk of being hurt. Pero alam naman natin, na kahit masakit, sige parin. Coz we know it's all worth it kapag nandun sa part na masaya. So never lose that hope, and never let the fear take over. Always have the courage to love.

Teka inaantok nako. Nakakaantok ata pag usapan ang Valentine's Day. Lalo na pag mag-isa ka nanaman hahahaha... FDS!

Another Sleepless Night

Work, work, work...

Think, think, think...

Some of us are doomed to spend sleepless nights alone.

Well, not exactly alone. I have several YM friends keeping me company. The wonders of technology, keeping people like me from committing suicide and dying a sad, tragic death, headlines reading "Consultant dies in a lonely, bitter end.". Hahahhaa! Stop the drama.

I am tired, but I plod on in a zombie-like trance. To my best YM friend (I doubt you ever read this), thanks for the company, and for helping me go on. (Di ko alam kung good ba to, pero we will find out, like you said, 'Abangan ang susunod na kabanata'). ;)

All right back to the grinder.

Ikaw Ang Lahat Sa Akin

From the first time I laid eyes on him I found that I had fallen in love. Yes, it's true, it was definitely love at first sight. His sleek, clean cut look and beautiful face made me lose my breath. I would find myself staring at him everyday. It wasn't a deep kind of love at first, I guess I could say that I was just proud to have someone like him around. Soon, though, I found there was nowhere I could go without him, or the thought of him lurking in my mind like an undeniable virus seeping into my system. I started doing everything with him, moonlit and sunlit walks around the city, lunchtimes made less boring with him around, window shopping, people watching, reminiscing. I've done the laundry, packed my bags to leave, and even slept with him in my arms. Dreary, rainy days (which I've always hated), could become sunny for me with him around. The more I spent time with him, the more I found I couldn't live with the thought of losing him. He did his part, always cheered me up when I was sad, and when his happy voice couldn't comfort me anymore, he was just there for me, being sad with me, waiting for the time when he could be happy with me again. And they always come around, the times when I am so happy just being with him I feel like strutting in the streets in a very John Travolta move. Sometimes, though, I find that I think I'm going deaf from having too much of him around. Err I think I should take off my earphones once in awhile.





Me and my Freddie